John Coates AOC Head. Likes the Olympics Committe Job, so much he has his sheets, drapes and tea towels all cut from the same cloth. An enormous sacrifice on his paltry 700 k salary.
Forget about Joe Hockey wiping out the car industry and taking a cushy job in Washington. Forget about the yawning gap between the haves’ and the have nots’, and forget about the incredible funding changes to uber rich schools with Gonski 2.0. They’re all irrelevant. What really matters in this country is the standing of the head of the Australian Olympic Committee.
‘Richo”, the man you need when you’re being challenged by a sheila.
As far as sinecures go this is possibly the cushiest job in town. For twenty eight years it’s been held by John Coates. To coin the Barry Humphries-ism, “ He’s internationally famous in Australia” for holding the Australian Olympic Committee in international regard. His salary is a mere seven hundred thousand, and with a salary like that we can bet he almost matches federal politicians for Investment property portfolio’s. That’s the best thing about senior executives who get paid that much, they always are steadfast agents for change. Well , provided that change doesn’t affect their self interest. Thats what’s pretty good about the status quo right across the board, they’re all pretty comfy, and though they may snipe a bit, they’re not all that interested in tax policy equity or even health care. But they’re terribly important. And they’re fond of telling us so. QED, ‘We’, the great unwashed are un-important.
But we digress. John is seriously worried, he’s been there for bloody years and some upstart sheila wants his job. John has got some good mates. For starters his best mate is Graeme Richardson. And if you’re under fire, he’s the go-to bloke. Actually after the spectacular fire at the printing business he owned with Rene Rivkin, there’s a pretty good chance he’ll come out on top. John is also backed by Mark Arbib. He was the faceless numbers man, who sent the Rudd Government , ( though Rudd didn’t need much helping) into under-drive. Mark will sort out almost any problem, and with a bit of luck he’ll come out on top as well. He’s a bit like ‘Jumpin-Joe’ Hockey, always sure to make his pitch very self advantageous, but intellectually lazy most of the other time. In Australia, the lazier you are, the more ambitious you are. Makes you a winner.
Mark Arbib. Head of Athletics Australia. ( sorry, we are not joking)
There’s not much winning on the medal tally, and that’s a really an important indicator of where this country is that. And there’s not much happiness in the Australian Olympic Committee. Danni Roche, (Who the F is she?), the pretender, actually used to play sport. Worse still, she’s from Victoria. That’s just not cricket! John and his mates are fuming. It’s just not the burdensome task of being a representative of the IOC, which is almost as colourful as being a member of FIFA. It’s the task of going on junkets, accepting gifts, being wined and dined, and looking terribly important. ALL OF THE TIME!!
Dannii Roche, Actually plays sport, and says she could do the job for 100k. How dare she!
And besides, it’s about representing Australian values, of narrowness, smugness, self- interest insularity and hubris. That’s a struggle. But with ‘Richo’ and ‘Marko’ on the job, guaranteed the votes will go John’s way. And that’s the true principle of Aussie sport; ‘Mateship’.