same sex marriage all sorted.

The good thing about the same sex debate is that it’s kept us all busy. It’s kept our minds off all the distasteful things that we’d rather not know about, and in between it’s united and disunited us over everthing else. Well almost everything else.

“Civilisation” This is what Queensland is famous for.

Just last week we found out (we’d been told before) that over 400,000 acres of Queensland forest had been cleared in just a year. This is fantastic progress. We also found out that at the current rate of bleaching, the Great Barrier Reef will be completely stone cold dead within ten years. And that’s the optimistic scenario. As a bonus, we know that W.A reefs are also buggerred, and the Murray Darling, once worthy of the “Mighty” moniker, is so buggered it’s seriously in contention for a part pension and 457 visa, provided it can satisfy the stringent Centrelink criteria. There’s still quite a few people rotting on Manus Island, 400 odd at last count, and there’s signs that they’ll be there for a lot longer, which must be a source of great inspiration to them. Good then that few of them will celebrate Christmas there as they’re not all that into Christmas in the first place. And that’s because they’re Un-Australian

Indigenous incarcertion is still sky high and shows increased returns to the private prisons. Wages have gone beyond flat-lining and are now going backwards. Prices are up across the board, and the kiddies who were buggered, broken and bastardised by clergy will have a long time to wait, along with the diasabled who signed up for the NDIS. The speeds of the NBN aren’t all that flash either, at a billion trillion dollars the network might as well have been morse, and possibly a little faster. But the Chairman tells us that “She’ll be Jake”. No-one is quite sure who Jake is, but there’s a message that it may be an anagram for Kevin Rudd, or some other bloke, (a Malcolm was mentioned) who’s responsible for the NBN.

But though the environment is absolutely stuffed no one is worried about it. Cos it’s a sort of existential threat, and that can mean only one thing. It don’t vote. If existential threats voted we’d be buggered, but they just haven’t got the grasp of reality TV, Kim Kardashian’s bum, or anything to do with the Royal family.

But is it gay?

Corey, proof that being conservative hurts.

They’ve found a new planet, Earth-like only twelve light years away, but the problem is, we can’t go that fast, and if we did, we’d probably look like protoplasm when we get there. Which gets onto the most important part of contemporary news. That they’re about to map the human body, cell by cell. Which is all very well, but they haven’t yet mapped the human body soul by soul, and until they do, Corey Bernardii’s proposition on the floor of Parliament that abortions should be banned is hanging there out in the ether. Bit like a particle of information on the broadband. It’s very expensive, and we’re all cheapened in the process. And in the long run, just like the environment, nobody cares.