Fecund Featherbedder. Ascendant Species.

Dear readership, we continue our fascinating article detailing the decline of the Lesser Consultant.. Will it be extincted??  read on…

Surprised and perplexed we went in search of the LC, and (without irony) consulted the worlds authority on the subject, Professor Quentin Cockburn, current reader in Social Anthropology at the Lomberg , Australian Consensus Centre Advisory Council, University of Western Australia. ‘I can only say, as the LC was ideas based, and innovation based, It’s gone the way of the motor industry and research into renewables. It failed to recognise that our service based economy would render it obsolete. We offered it termination packages, but obtusely it couldn’t accept the notion that nonconformity was outmoded, obsolete. And in matters ancillary to this, (with emphasis) dress code, demeanor and attitudinal imperfections it just wouldn’t fit in’.. In some cases, (points to map of Australia) we’ve witnessed complete species extinction. It’s worse than the what the rabbits did. Asked for examples he pointed to the emergence of the ‘Lesser Academe’, (spuriosa conformis) and the ‘Fecund Featherbedder’ (sinecuris satrapsis).

lesser academe (female)

These two species hybridised. There is possibly a root cause. Both the academic and the Featherbedder filled a niche formerly occupied by the lesser sub consultant. It’s sad really. As the universities became less thinking orientated and more process orientated we saw the extinction of thought and ideas and its replacement by these two sub species, Nowadays, (he shrugs audibly) all we have in these institutions is the Featherbedder. It outclassed the lesser consultant due to its capacity to integrate into any environment

lesser academe (male)

Free Ranging Polymath. DANGEROUS!!

and assume by cultural osmosis a superficial appearance of competence and intelligence. Because it was overtly supine, had a highly developed survival instinct and stood for nothing it was supremely adaptable. Its awareness of the subversive danger of good ideas and thinking made it pre-eminent, and as you can see, (points to chart, “Tertiary Education Australia”) now there’s nothing else it’s a complete monoculture, possibly, and I use this reservedly, worse than the Crown of Thorns Starfish’. ‘Hmmm.’ The Professor continued abstractedly; ‘Still with no confirmed sightings, and inconclusive conjecture, suggestions poured in from allied anthropological Institutions, (the IPA and Grattan Institute) that the LC, was indeed eking out a living as an illustrator of sorts. We obtained evidence of scrawls on paper and screwed up yellow trace. Following a lead we asked the Institute of Architects. Their chair provided us with this startling observation; “It seems that rather than disappearing altogether this species has mutated to some degree, and may re-emerge. Though we have no record of any sightings in our institutions we have noticed via complaints to our directorate that the LC may have morphed, transmutated into the FRP, (the Free Ranging Polymath). We don’t see a threat yet, but polymaths are generally unemployable and hard to predict. The real threat is that they be taken seriously. Fortunately with our current Federal Government emphasis on service industry growth, and the rise of the LD, and the UM this is unlikely. With full automation predicted for all planning departments and the refinement of the supercomputer VCAT, all outcomes will be predetermined and lead to greater efficiencies in development and Investment. We cannot see the LC making any impact upon this growth strategy in the foreseeable future.

We are deeply concerned. To assist us in our search please contact either Quentin Cockburn or Cecil Poole at Passive Complicity.

Underpaid menial. Wages grafted to ensure comfort of Fecund Featherbedder

Lesser Dolt. Species expanding rapidly to fill imagination vacuum in Management.