(Previously posted 22 November 2014)

Γεια σας και πάλι φίλοι μου,

That 21^st Century Oracle ‘Wikipedia’ tells me that ‘Oxymoron’ is derived from the 5th century Latin oxymoron, which is derived from the Ancient Greek: ὀξύςoxus “sharp, keen” and μωρός mōros “dull, stupid”, making the word itself an oxymoron. The Oracle also tells me that “modern usage has brought a common misunderstanding that ’oxymoron’ is nearly synonymous with ‘contradiction’.”

Of this I plead guilty. It is the ‘moron’ bit that makes my sense of irony find ‘oxymoron’ a useful and appealing word even if laboring under a common misunderstanding.

For over a decade the Howard Government undermined Land Rights and Reconciliation. Around 2006 then Minister for Aboriginal Affairs Mal Brough made claims that paedophile rings were operating on Aboriginal communities as part of, in hindsight, an orchestrated campaign of stereotyping and stigmatizing Aboriginal communities (and Aboriginal men in particular). In 2007 in a desperate bid for re-election the campaign climaxed in the announcement of the Northern Territory Emergency Response (NTER or Intervention)

The NTER included a significant effort by the Federal Police (from memory several years with an expenditure exceeding $30Million) acting with extraordinary powers under the Crimes Act 1914. The Act inter alia forbids people questioned to reveal that they have been or will be questioned and to mention what they have been questioned about and should they so reveal, they risk years of incarceration. Despite this massive effort no more paedophile rings were discovered than there were WMDs found in Iraq. A straw giant.

When John Howard lost the election and when Kevin Rudd made that famous Sorry speech
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKWfiFp24rA
we all thought that we’d arrived at a Bran Nu Dae…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JiShXMojKfY

The speech in hindsight was a political stunt. Its main purpose, it now seems, was to show up John Howard who had wedged himself into refusing to say sorry.

Mal Brough’s baton was handed to Jenny Macklin who proceeded to take ownership of the Intervention and to further tighten its grip on Remote Aboriginal Australia.

Her chutzpah knew no bounds and is epitomized by her using the Aboriginal Benefits Account (a money tree nurtured by royalty equivalents derived from mining on Aboriginal land) as a personal slush fund to further her agenda, such as building a community stores empire (Government owned Outback Stores) and (wait for it!) paying rents to Traditional Owners for compulsory acquired leases.

During the campaign for the election that saw the end of Jenny Macklin’s Protectorate of Aborigines, Tony Abbott pledged that if he won he would become the Prime Minister  for Indigenous Affairs.

The first Abbott/Hockey Budget saw half a billion dollars cut from the funding of Aboriginal Affairs. Most of the cuts will have very little effect on places like Yuendumu.

The Warlpiri word Waralypa means rain that doesn’t reach the earth. Consulting the oracle I find:

“In meteorology, virga is an observable streak or shaft of precipitation that falls from a cloud but evaporates or sublimes before reaching the ground.”

Thus is funding and that capitalist myth the “trickledown effect” (which is right up there with  “level playing field”)

I want to know…Have you ever seen the rain?…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEY8clFcm2E

Yesterday we had our first decent shower of rain in Yuendumu for quite a while.
Tu pelo tiene el aroma de la lluvia sobre la tierra…(your hair has the aroma of rain on the earth)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E3gvCTC2EQ

It isn’t  all doom and gloom in Yuendumu. The much maligned (by me) Centrelink at Yuendumu (you know, the $2M plus building that arrived on the back of 5 trucks all the way from Bendigo?) is now run and fully staffed by Yuendumu locals. The little flame of self-determination flickers on.

….Long as I can see the light….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q1809vqz3zA

Last July, our self styled Prime Minister for Indigenous Affairs delivered a speech at The Australian/Melbourne Institute. The speech included the unsettling premise that:

“I guess our country owes its existence to a form of foreign investment by the British government in the then unsettled or, um, scarcely settled, Great South Land,”

The Adam Giles (Northern Territory) Government is very keen on empowering itself. The $7.6M police complex being built at Yuendumu (not to mention the half a billion dollars  third prison , which in fairness to Adam Giles precedes his tenure) being but one facet of this.

The Abbott Government is very keen on empowering Aboriginal communities. How do I know this? I’ve been made aware that despite the budget cuts, $5M has been made available to ‘Empowered Communities’(EC) through ‘Closing the Gap’ (CtG).

An EC is defined as one “committed to enforcing individual rights and responsibilities including:

• Children attend school every day, are on time, and are school ready.
• Children and those who are vulnerable are cared for and safe.
• Capable adults participate in training or work.
• People abide by the conditions related to their tenancy in public housing – they maintain their homes.
• People do not commit domestic violence, alcohol and drug offences, or petty crimes and pay their rent. “

Sounds alright, but can you hear the dog whistle?  Am I being a bit too cynical when I suspect “enforced rights” to be an oxymoron?

Coercive Reconciliation: Stabilise, Normalise, Exit Aboriginal Australia
A bit like “coercive reconciliation” (The 2007 Intervention).

Get up, stand up, stand up for your rights…..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F69PBQ4ZyNw

Δύναμη στο λαό …Power to the people…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wos-dDxpJlQ

Μέχρι την επόμενη φορά

Frank

Guthrie, Milne and Turnbull. When they were all mates. Because they were united singly in their complete and absolute ignorance of journalism.

Dear reader, we noticed with deep concern the recent protest in the ABC’s Ultimo headquarters. There we had it in full public view. Visibly agitated and distressed men and  women, voicing their anger at the direction of the Chairman and board of the ABC. Sadly we also noticed that within the crowd, on balance there seemed almost as many women as men. This does not reflect the current structure of Government!!

WE at Pcbycp would like to know if the women were actually journalists, or as has been suggested by our facial recognition experts, just operatives, cleaners, cooks, and admin staff, coralled to make a crowd scene look credible. 

An old bearded man. Last time we had this many old men running things we declared war on German New Guinea.

WE have it on good authority that within the ABC there are approximately 35.5 ancillary staff to every journalist. This is twice the ratio required to manufacture cars before the industry closed down and possibly only one half the ratio of mangement to flunkeys required to get the NBN up and running. Which begs the question, Who is doing the reporting at the ABC? We know this much. There are troublemakers. But strangely, when we borrowed the Border Force facial recogniton scanner technology, (recently on trial from China) we were dissappointed to see the ringleaders, Tingle, Alberici and Probyn were not there. 

This just exemplifies the cowardly approach of contemporary journalists. Whilst the leaders, Murdoch, Stokes and Milne, take all the flak for making sensible decisions, these malcontents go viral with their culture of complaint. 

Laura Tingle. Troublemaker!

Emma Alberici. Questioned genius of Tony Abbott. Troublemaker!

WE know that being a Chairman is an immense responsibility.  There  are corporate lunches which will stretch the waistline. There are public fundraising events, which are time consuming, and utterly boring, and there is a requirement, which must be met on an almost daily basis to meet with politicians. These politicians must be briefed on what the news agenda is. Why the news must be nuanced to get the right “outcomes”. And why journalists must be told just to do their job. And that requires them to be put in their place, and not get any dangerous ideas about free speech, independence and other leftist claptrap. And not LEAK! And when the Chairman quite rightlfully refers to the Managing Director as “missus”, it is not a patronising appellation, but a recognition in as much a the Queen is referred to as ‘Maam’, of the nature of things. The nature of things as determined by the manual on how things are to be done. The Bible. Which states, quite clearly; “She may be respected, even receive a comparable salary, but her attainments will always be tempered by the Will of Man. For he was borne in God’s likeness”, etc  .etc.. etc… And the journalists who wrote those facts, were all men. And set the standard for reportage of current afairs as FACT.

The public are tired of free speech. The Management, the Government and the Governor General who appoints the Chairman are thoroughly tired with free speech. And pesky journalists and women should know their place. And reflect our parliament, the most noble representation of governance there is, with the  understanding that women’s voices must be stilled and they belong on the back bench. No one has the right to express ideas, without prior consent of the lobbyists, the big end of town, and Rupert. For that is written. by the spiritual leader of the Party and Government itself. Bob. 

Not Menzies Stupid. 

Justin Milne in younger days reporting for the Biblical Times.

Santamaria!

Rupert, frontrunner to manage the ABC. Because he already does.

We’ve been doing quite a bit of soul searching. After our experience in the presence of Lord Rupert of Murdoch, we see things differently. And from now on, we choose to make a difference to our society and bring benefits and delight to those who choose the correct path. 

Lord Rupert has given us this much. A sense of ourselves.  Wheras once we used to think that humans, society and the commonwealth could be elected, by deep thought, dignity and the spirit of equity, we know now that this is untrue. We shouldn’t try too hard.  And obey only one law. The law of Murdoch which says, “be humble, know thy place, and observe power that canot be stemmed, for it is for thy own good”. 

Barnaby, Good as GOLD!!

Could we start by congratulating the ABC board on removing Michelle Guthrie. The board are on the ball.  And with a bit of luck communication between the board and it’s titular head Sir Rupert, Lord of Murdoch is absolute. Pesky journalists must learn, not to bite the hand that feeds it. And the hand, let this be known, is not the taxpayer, but Lord Rupert. And Lord Rupert is not pleased, that after extensive talent searches, they always, (the abc board) come up with the wrong appointments. 

So here’s a few pointers, and we hope someone on board, (nice pun), takes heed. 

For the new CEO?

Our first choice is Barnaby Joyce.   He’d make a good head.  He’s good at talking and he is undoubtedly a champion of the ordinary person. He can make connections. That’s why he’s special envoy for the Murray Darling. He can connect people on the river with irrigators. And irrigators with the people. And the people with the rivers.  And the irrigators to ensure the funding for fish, ecosytems and the entire biota is redirected to irrigators. And the bonus is the same irrigators will get huge bonuses paid for by the taxpayer. To make huge profits and employ someone to turn those rivers of water. INTO RIVERS OF GOLD!!! 

Tone! A man of conviction,who never lets new ideas get in the way of CERTAINTY!!

Barnaby would be a shoe-in for the ABC. Do a better job of connecting than Michelle Guthrie did, and make the ABC relevant by relocating the entire organisation to the headwaters of the Darling, or the Diamintina. With up to date reporting on farming issues and how to open up useless country for industrial scale farming. 

Tony Abbott would be a front runner. He knows about certainty. That’s what the ABC needs. It needs certainty. Only one program provides certainty, Q and A. And with Q and A pushing the intervention, Tony can rightly say it’s been a catalyst for certainty and incarceration of Aboriginal Australians right across the country. And that’s good news for the shareholder. 

Tony Abbott, has conviction!

But,  there is a journalist for the job. Technically speaking he may not be a journalist, but he’s a great thinker.  Alan Jones.  He’s clever, insightful and knows how to arrive at the right conclusion, and how to question those who dare question. 

So it’s a conundrum. A conundrum for Lord Rupert. A conundrum for whoever may be the Prime Minister at any time. And a conundrum for the board. 

So who would best serve the ABC?

Our answer? Roman Quadvelig. He brings security and safety to the ABC, and an unquestioning ability to balance the needs of the public. 

For himself.

Roman, reliable, forthright and untroubled by uncertainty

For our own good. 

Hi friends (and others),

On top of the Google Search for “safety and security what is the difference between” you find:

“The basic idea of both is protecting assets from hazards/threats creating safe/secure conditions. The condition safety is about being protected, while the condition security is about being free from danger. The differences between being protected and being free from danger or threat are not easily seen.”

Interesting that- I was hoping for an explanation in relation to people rather than assets.

According to other entries the main difference is that security is from deliberate threats and safety is from accidental threats.

Melbourne University Student Union’s Magazine “Farrago” was first published in 1925. Half way through its lifetime I got to look forward to it and avidly read it. A much more enjoyable pursuit than swotting for exams.

A regular feature of the magazine was a multi-panelled cartoon called “Tex”.

On one occasion Tex was constructing a wire fence. On completion of the enclosure, in the final panel, Tex was standing in the middle and proclaimed in a loud voice “GOTCHAZ!!!”

Ever since, I have not been able to look at a security fence without briefly pondering- did it aim to keep people/animals/or whatever, in or out?

Walls have the same effect on me.

When in 1971 we travelled through Panama (on our way back to Australia from Canada), the 1964 riots were still fresh in Panamanian minds, I was told that the fence separating the Panama Canal Zone from Panama City had been torn down by hand by angry crowds

From Wikipedia I learn that Colombia’s ambassador to the Organization of American States was quoted as saying  “In Panama there exists today another Berlin Wall”

When the Berlin Wall came down in 1989, much of the world was ecstatic. Will we ever learn? World-wide, fence and wall erecting is booming. Is it making the world a safer and more secure place?

Bonnie Raitt- ‘Silver Lining’ ….Shine it till the walls come tumbling down…..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcDaAr3EPqI

Well, every dark cloud has it’s silver lining. The numerous walls and fences being erected around the world, engender the possibility that ecstatic crowds will get to tear them down!

 Woodie Guthrie- ‘This land is your land’:

….There was a big high wall that tried to stop me, a sign was painted said ‘private property….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaI5IRuS2aE

From my dad’s anecdotes:

APRIL’07- In the villa, there was a telephone exchange. Everyone had been invited to Mr. Otten (one of the suppliers)’s birthday party. The villa had been left almost vacant. Lucas and I stayed behind. Before the war, Lucas had served on Dutch submarines, and he therefore had a good understanding of electronics. Whilst I kept a look out, Lucas went to work. Not only did he cut wires, but he also cross-wired and soldered wires together. Lucas had his eye on the beautiful curtains, and I had to dissuade him from taking them (“are you off your rocker? Hurry up we’ve got to get out of here!”). It all took too long and we disturbed the guards. The front gate had been locked. We had to leave through the heavily guarded back. We flew over the back yard and over the two meter high wall, and if we’d been in the Olympics we’d both would have got medals! A group of Ukrainian guards with their guard dogs chased us. We ran off (more medals!) and escaped into a garden……

…..The next morning we turned up for work as per usual. “Good morning Mr. Breitruck” “Good morning??…don’t you know what happened last night? Some bastards came in last night and destroyed the telephone exchange. They knew what they were doing” “How did they get away?” “There, over that wall, through that mine field…” “Ah well, mine-field, mine-field, what mine-field? There are signs ‘Danger Mines’ all over the place…” “THERE, THERE ARE MINES!” When he said that, I could taste my breakfast in my mouth! It turned out the telephone exchange was far more important to the Germans than we had ever imagined.

(This is my English translation from an anecdote told to me in Dutch with German dialogue – If you wish to receive a copy of the unabridged “foreign” original- just say so)

It is said that at the Parliamentary canteen in Canberra, they’re running short of knives. We have once again had our Prime Minister replaced. These days Australian politics deny me the excitement of being surprised,

The appointment of Tony Abbott as a Special Envoy to Indigenous Australia came as no surprise. All one had to do is think what would have been the worst possible choice, and presto!  I was thinking how best to express myself on this bizarre and insulting occurrence, when my friends at ‘pcbycp’ http://www.pcbycp.com/  (Passive Complicity by Cockburn and Poole) saved me the trouble:

“Aboriginal Australians know they’ve got a man of action as their special protector. Not since Augustus Robertson have Aboriginal Australians been so protected by a man who’s got a handle on their problems. And he’s got the  equipment to ensure that their problems will be looked at and possibly augmented with better incarceration, better disenfranchisement, and better isolation, better as he famously said; to equip them for their ‘lifestyle choices’.”

As it says at the beginning of this Dispatch: “The condition safety is about being protected”

What Australia needs, is an Abbott Proof Fence.

Frank

Rosemary Clooney ‘Don’t Fence me in’….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXg6-A-Dkfs

Peter Gabriel – Ngankarrparni (Sky Blue) – The Rabbit-Proof Fence

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qi0RL1ze12Y

Dear reader, as you recall, we’d almost got out of Federal Parliament with most of our five hundred million intact, when we were tapped on the shoulder. What follows is a description of such inescapable fear, loathing and humiliation, we suggest for the old, young and infirm, they stop reading right now, and listen to the soothing strains of local abc radio.

As we descended we came across skeletons of those who’d perished in trying to change Parliament. Skeletons of WOMEN!

Down we went, past the guards who saluted their leader, and through a sucession of very elaborate doors. As each door boomed and closed behind us, another door, double bolted, solid armour plate and concrete, swung open. And through each apeture the corridor grew narrower and narrower as we walked through another door and another and then another. WE were crawling now, deep deep down into the bowels of whatever passes for the subterranean realm of tunnels beneath parliament house. Tunnels of which the very existence is scarcely known and as legend hath it, used to lead directly to the very centre of the earth, and onwards through to the corridors of power in the People’s Republic of China. 

I tried to reassure Mrs Coldtart that Peter meant her no harm!

After following Peter dutifully for over an hour, we  found ourself crawling along what semed to be an airconditioning duct. It was dark and clammy. And just as members of  our more senior entourage were flagging, we arrived at an antechamber. Inside the antechanber, which was not much bigger than a small room, we were told to wait. From an apeture in the  wall, a door opened, Within six suits all white with crosses on the breast pocket.  Peter motioned us to don them, we obediently did. 

We were asked to don these strange white suits

Peter then commanded  us to sit down. He also commanded “men this side, women this side”. We complied. What else could we do? We all felt an ominous sense of foreboding. But as we were now under the very depths of Parliament, we thought it wise to comply. As we sat, in a small circle, waiting for the next move the room became dim, the single naked globe flickered, spluttered, and then with a spasm went out. WE were plunged in darkness. Mrs Coldtart our stenographer began to whimper, for a moment it seemed all was lost until we became aware of a dull bluish glow. By degrees it got brighter and brighter until all of us were bathed in a shimmering light. Peter, outlined in his splendour, stood tall and resolute, placed his hands in prayer and looked up. Incredibly a void opened up and from up above a light more incandescent than a thousand suns shone forth. 

It looked for all the world like the light of GOD! 

WE were stilled, paralysed with anticipation, till a voice spoke. A powerful voice. A voice strangely familiar. And it said, “ Who are you, and why do you seek the role of women in parliament” ? Cecil offered a meek reply, ‘Cos we want to know why’? 

But the voice went on, as if we didn’t exist. “Who are these people’? Peter Dutton replied as if mesemerised, as if controlled by an invisible force;  “ordinary folk”! 

The voice then boomed; “Why do they come’?, Peter replied again; “curiosity”, and then the voice, “Why should they LIVE then’? 

We trembled, Peter replied, “for they work, pay taxes to you my LORD,  and do thy bidding”, and the voice then boomed, ‘Stand’!! 

” I am RUPERT Lord of MURDOCH’!

We all stood up. The voice proclaimed this; 

“I am RUPERT Lord of Murdoch. I am government. I am the people. I am the Australian singularity. It is I who bring self loathing! It is I who tell you what you cannot do! It is I who make and destroy Prime Ministers and Cabinet. First Law of Murdoch, there are to be no women in parliament unless they are given unto me. For I am all seeing and all powerful. There is no other law than Murdoch. There is no truth other than Murdoch. There is no existence other than Murdoch.  Obey me, or DIE’!!

In an instant the light went out. And we knew nothing. 

Cecil and I were strangely drawn to the evil power. It was INESCAPABLE!!.

Was it a dream? 

We found ourselves back at pcbycp headquarters. Our money had evaporated. Like it never existed. Clarrie said “it’s like we never went to Canberra and the whole thing never happened”. WE thought of ringing the ABC, but we were too scared. Lord Rupert owned it, and  no one would believe us, and even if they did, we had such a sense of foreboding we knew, that to speak would spell doom. Doom and the eternity of knowing that we’d crossed an inviloate force, and from there-on would be oblivion. And we knew deep down, though we dared not admit it, that something inside us had changed. Changed us FOREVER!

Only the other day Mrs Coltart quipped; “Good thing there are NO women in the Liberal party. The whole idea is absurd. What use are they anyway’? WE all agreed, something had changed in our view of things, but the manner of it was inexplicable. WE knew, but dared not to question. And we knew within there was now a void. There was nothing we could do about it. And we also knew, as if our minds had been cleansed in our ignorance, there was peace. And in not knowing there was contentment. We’d seen the light in the beautiful darkness. Lord Rupert had spoken.  Women in the parliamentary Liberal Party is a non issue

The real issue is;  Colingwood plays Richmond friday night. 

And what is wrong with Dustin Martins Knee? 

Continued from the previous blog….

As promised we received the money in two plain envelopes. 

The envelopes were marked in clear print, “Clean Energy Fund” and within each envelope, (they were big envelopes) we found cleanly and efficiiently bundled two hundred and fifty million dollars. At first we thought, there must be some mistake, but when we rang the Minister for Energy, his department, the secretary, the cleaner, no one had any knowledge of the money. 

Minister for Women, Kelly O Dwyer. Sporting High viz para military prototype safety vest to identify and protect women in Parliament.

So we did what any normal person would do, we bought some very expensive tea rather than the Home Brand stuff we get from the market, and booked ourselves on international flights, to Italy, France, the U.K, Germany and Russia, to do a fact finding tour. A tour we thought was essential just to see what other countries do with women in politics.  Booked it all first class, cos fact finding is hard case stuff, and just before leaving, we thought a side trip to Canberra, may give us a briefing. A “heads up” as they say, and a strategy for how to spend the half billion which may give the taxpayers “value for money”

Kelly trialling another prototype para military low viz, (camouflage) flak jacket and bullet supressing couch in Liberal Party Bunker annex, IPA Headquarters. Location undisclosed.

WE thought given the staggering drop in participation of females in the party it had to do with external factors. Some strange alchemy at work from outside the party, rather than a toxic environment within the party itself. Because as we saw it, the Liberal party upheld a great tradition of women senators. Doing important things, like upolding the rights of women to do what women do best. Portfolios, in home care, knitting and womens issues. This was our starting point. We asked the party heads, what they knew about womens issues, and were directed to Kelly O Dwyer, Minister for Women. We figured, feeling responible now we had half a billion dollars to spend on resolving this vexed issue, that she would at least give us a strategy from which to divine the truth. To our surprise, she said; “I don’t have any idea about what you should do with the money. As a matter of fact, I have no idea why I’m here. I asked for a job in the catering department and was given Minister for Industrial Relations. I have no experience in this field, but I’m told if I keep wages down, supress fair arbitration, ensure that casual workers get less, and big companies don’t pay tax, I’ve got a job for life. But as for women I haven’t got a clue. Its not core policy’. 

Before we were finished with our tea and biscuits she abruptly showed us the door, and said: ” Gotta go now. Got an important job to do which I must perform every fifteen minutes’, and before we could say “What the’? , she started shouting “unions unions, bloody unions”, and started punching the door and kicking the tasteful marble coffee table with her stilettos. 

Kelly vainly seeks protection by standing close to PM. She is wearing high viz suicide vest just in case she is targeted before PM is, in another unprovoked drive-by shooting.

We were ushered into a hallway, a bit let down, and as we walked down a series of long corridors, we felt we were being watched. It’s an uncanny feeling, but there was this ominous presence, and it made us feel uneasy. Good thing then we had a couple of million stuffed into each pocket, cos Kelly had warned us, that if you’re in a fix in parliament it helps to have deep pockets. We also noticed that there were no politicians, they all seemed to be shut in their offices, just all these shady figures loitering. They seemed poised to snatch any polly who ventured into the corridor. “The corridors of power” Cecil whispered. They also had money bulging from pockets. After some deliberation, we knew they must be lobbysists, the most powerful forces at work in the Australian body politic. 

WE were told not to look directly at them, for the curse would be worse than the curse of Medusa. So glumly we walked on. Not able to shed any light on the Liberal Women conundrum. 

And just as we reached the parliamentary perimeter, with guards dressed in Border Force uniforms. And just as we had our visitor passes, reviewed, scanned and removed, we were tapped on the shoulder.  In shock we turned, It was Peter Dutton. He looked strangely awkward, and before we could say “ambush’, he said, solemly, “ there’s someone who wants to see you”. 

And grimly, like those being led to the executioner, we meekly followed, 

Minister for Fear, Incarceration and Dostoyevsky Peter Dutton, insists we accompany him. He is also trilalling low viz Border Force camoflague Black ops uniform.

To be continued. 

Anne Sudmalis. Alleged “woman” representing the Liberal Party.

Dear reader, we were delighted yesterday. It seems the ignoble, isolating, and remote task of maintaining a blog, a benign form of romantic delusional self indulgence, has just been given a lift. Just yesterday at 3.30 pm we were contacted by the Liberal party. A man, who’s wish is to remain anonymous, and represents the highest ranked offical within the party, commissioned us to do some ground- breaking research. Entrusting us to do something about the status of women!

In short we were flabbergasted, but deeply honoured. We asked him, after we had recovered from the shock, “Did the people from the Great Barrier Reef foundation respond in a similar manner when they had been awarded the five hundred million’? He replied, insouciantly, “Well, they took it in their stride. You see, the lobbyists that work for defence, energy and the environment ensure the “right stuff” gets bought. They know that with the right connections, they can assume the money will flow to the “correct” channels. That’s how funding works in government. We dont hand out to any ordinary charity. We hand it to the one where our mates are there to ensure it goes to the right mates. That’s what gave Australia Gallipoli and all that, the “Greatness of Mateness”. 

Well then why did you choose us? (we asked)

Two more women who’ve infiltrated the party and until recently gone undercover as BLOKES!

His answer was simple and straight to the point, 

Grant Shulz, who is to replace Ann Sudmalis. Real Estate Agent and Liberal POWERBROKER!

‘You are independent, and we’ve done a bit of research. You and your readership of three know what integrity is all about. We have no idea what integrity is. We asked the bloke who’s replacing Anne Sudmalis, and he reckons integrity is something to do about checking the section 18 before you sign off on a new real estate deal. He represents the new breed within the party, the Real Estate agent. But, though that’s our strength, real estate and vested interests, we absolutely, (and I’ve gotta be honest here), know fuck-all about women. We know less about women than we do renewables. And most of the backbench, have never heard of women doing much beyond ” home duties” also. Some of them reckon their mothers may have been women, but are not sure.  You see real estate is not like women. That’s why we like to source our new generation of representatives, either from the IPA, or Real Estate.  With Real Estate, you get the certainty.  With sheilas, (he corrected), with women, you never know which way the wind is blowing. 

Women are a bit like the Abo’s. You’d think they’d be a little more greatful for just being there and having a bit of money tossed in their general direction, and an army of bureaucrats making big money pretending to help. But it’s more complex than that. We find their ingratitude is at the heart of it.  And we want you to do some heavy duty fact finding. You are independent, don’t work with the certainty of  Real Estate, and may have a insight that could help us out.”

Apologies. The real Grant Schultz. Family man, Real Estate Agent, and Conservative non thinking person.

But, (we asked), Do you want women in your party?  “Not really, but that’s immaterial.  We’ve gotta look like we like women. It’s a bit like when we made Adam Goodes Australian of the year. Some of the blokes hated the idea, but it had to be done to show we were really keen on recognition. Even though we don’t want a bar of it. That’s why we made Tony, the special envoy for Aboriginal Australians, to show we had a sense of humour and they can choke on their fucking reconcilliation. Hadn’t laughed so much since Gough made Vince Gair special envoy to Ireland. 

Then he said, 

“You’ll get the money in installments. In plain envelopes delivered to your door. We’ve diverted money from the clean energy fund. We know you can DO IT’!!. 

And before we’d offered our thanks the phone went dead. 

To be continued…..  

So reassuring to know that our Prime Minister is guided by superstition and myth now turned into Christian theology – which “induces a dogmatic belief that we have knowledge where in fact we have ignorance, and by doing so generates a kind of impertinent insolence towards the universe.” (Bertram Russell).  2,400 years ago Epricurus (341 – 270 BC)  wrote of the dangers of these superstitions and two hundred years later his philosophy was articulated and refined in Titus Lucretius Carus’ epic poem “The Nature of Things”.  Here we present a few lines of this 7000 line epic.

From Book 1 Matter and Void.

One thing I am concerned about: you might, as you commence
Philosophy, decide you see impiety therein,
And that the path you enter is the avenue to sin.
More often, on the contrary, it is Religion breeds
Wickedness and that has given rise to wrongful deeds
As when the leaders of the Greeks, those peerless peers, defiled
The Virgin’s altar with the blood of Agamemnon’s child,
Iphigenia.  As soon as they bound the fillet round her hair
So that its ends streamed down her cheeks, the girl became aware
That waiting at the temple for her would be no groom –
Instead she saw her father with a countenance of gloom
Attended by the priests who kept the blade well hid.  The sight
Of people shedding tears to see her froze her tongue with fright.
She sank to the ground upon her knees.  It did not mean a thing
For the princess now, that she had been the first to give the king
The name of Father.  No, for shaking, the poor girl was carried
By the hands of men up to the altar, not that she be married
With solemn ceremony , to the accompanying strain
Of loud-sung bridal hymns, but as a maiden, pure of stain,
To be impurely slaughtered, at the age when she should wed,
Sorrowful sacrifice slain at her father’s hand instead.
All this for fair and favourable winds to sail the fleet along! –
So potent was Religion in persuading to do wrong.

From The Nature of Things, Book 1, Lines 80 to 101.
Translation by A.E. Stallings 2007.  Penguin Classics.

Stallings suggests that the poem is not antagonistic to piety but to organised religion.

The Intervention: Not just racist, but with fascist overtones.

8Our Dispatch today was first published on 12 August 2011.

Buenos dias compañeros,

My mother was a “the glass is half full” person. As she stood doing the dishes, looking out her kitchen window, contemplating her garden, she’d exclaim: Is het niet prachtig, wat zijn we toch gelukkig! (Isn’t it wonderful, aren’t we lucky!).

Douglas Adams said: “Isn’t it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?”

Mum didn’t need the fairies.

My mother  also said that Australia was the best country in the world, but that there were some people based in Canberra that were doing their utmost to spoil it.

Fortunately I’ve inherited her joie de vivre. I don’t need fairies either, but I don’t begrudge others their fairies.

Had she lived until I ‘discovered’ Violeta Parra’s most famous song on You Tube, she would have shared my enthusiasm for it.

http://youtu.be/UW3IgDs-NnA

Gracias a la vida que me ha dado tanto…. (Thanks to Life, that has given me so much…)

A tragic irony that Violeta took her own life.

My father on the other hand was a “the glass is half empty” person. At times he could delegate those ‘Grumpy Old Men’ of the British television series to mere amateur status.

From my dad’s anecdotes:

“ There is much in Australia to get angry about. Peter Reith and Chris Corrigan’s actions on the waterfront some years ago were a particular cause for anger and loathing. At present we have that lying bastard John Howard, that smirking Peter Costello and his mate that sneaky Tony Abbott (more Catholic than the Pope) (OK, yes, anti-Catholicism as well), that evil Phillip Ruddock and last but not least ‘Lippy’ as dad calls him (Alexander Downer). The whole gang being cause for almost apoplectic revulsion.”

“ SEP.’07- Not all that long ago dad was having one of his sessions and kept coming up with his now habitual rather negative opinions. This caused his daughter in law (of whom he is rather fond) to remark that: “Well, you know Mark: every silver lining has its dark cloud”. Touché!”

http://youtu.be/kcDaAr3EPqI shining till the walls come tumbling down….

In 1957 ‘The Black Cloud’, a science fiction novel by astrophysicist Sir Fred Hoyle, was published. A black cloud enveloped earth causing what later became known as a ‘nuclear winter’. All life on earth was threatened, until eventually the black cloud drifted away. Much damage was done but eventually life on earth recovered.

Fifty years later (2007) a black cloud enveloped remote Aboriginal Australia. It became known as ‘The Intervention’

Fred Hoyle’s black cloud was intelligent, the one we are living under isn’t.

I once again quote Martin Flanagan : “To visit Yuendumu is to have the glass tower of your preconceptions shattered into countless brilliant fragments”

To see the brilliant glass fragments, the sun needs to shine on them. The black cloud prevents this from happening.

The sun is gonna shine… someday…

http://youtu.be/_Cos9l_ME2M

Hasta pronto

Franklin

La yapa:

http://youtu.be/Eto2urJTKno

Billy was a brilliant politician, strategist, and on issues like Vietnam and Conscription, a real thinker.

Dear reader, we think you’d have to agree that whichever way you look at it, the Morrison Government represents a profound and deep seated change of direction for the Coalition Government. Right across the board, on the front bench, the back bench, and back into the party machinery the party is new, confident and reinvigorated. Indeed we would like to go so far and say that as far as innovation, forward thinkingness and courage it reminds us in so many ways of the Macmahon Government. A government so radical it bought to us the Whitlam era of fundamental change. 

Stable Government. Billy’s front Bench. A NO sheila zone. A great Liberal tradition.

For instance, just the other day we heard form Barnaby Joyce. It seems the former deputy leader has a a lot to say about policy direction, and he always gives his two bobs worth. And Bob Santamaria and Bob Menzies would be proud to know that their policy direction of nothing much in particular is the right thing. Mr Morrison himself is deterrmined to get the message right. There will be NO CHANGE. No change to tax inequity, No change on climate. There is NO issue with climate. No change on inequities right across the board. 

This is the sercurity and safety of policy planning that all Australians need, and it sets us up for at lest the next few weeks with stability and security. Security in knowing that we will have the same Prime Minister at least until the Grand Final is over. And security in knowing that the toughest border restrictions EVER are on hand to ensure that only the odd au pair may get through the net. 

And still there’s criticism.  A few malconent women don’t iike being abused, belittled and dumped with a barrage of mysoginy. Well the word is; ‘it’s  a tough game’, and that’s what we like, these boys play it tough and toughness gets results. 

Billy’s ministry. More evidence of strong leadership and no sheilah’s.

A few results thus far. Aborignal Australians know they’ve got a man of action as their special protector. Not since Augustus Robertson have Aborignial Australians been so protected by a man who’s got a handle on their problems. And he’s got the  equipment to ensure that their problems will be looked at and possibly augmented with better incarceration, better disenfranchisement, and better isolation, better as he famously said; to equip them for their ‘lifestyle choices’. 

And in the vexed question of energy, the party is in lock step. There is no question of energy. The public, parliament and the population are crying out for coal. Well that’s what their lobyists tell them, and the rest of us are not entitled really to have an opinon on such high level issues. 

On refugees, the word is  may they rot forever. A true sign of compassion. And for the big businesses who pay no tax, yet reap fortune from the taxpayer, the message is; “it’s business as usual’. 

Billy rehearses for the annual Parliamentary ball 1972. Sadly he was kicked out before he could present his ” little Jack Horner” routine to the press gallery.

No reform is doing Australia good. Good for shareholders and good in the knowledge that with no change, there are no RISKS.  And we are all SAFE.