Our very own Mrs Culthorpe, a saintly woman destroyed by ” THE SYSTEM”!
Dear reader, what a pickle our heroes are in, with the defiling of Mrs Culthorpe, just a memory, they find themselves waiting for an audience with ‘Big G’. Though they have an inkling it could be Australia’s richest woman, there seems to be an unsettling fear, that their travails are about to get ‘travailonsterous’. Will this be their final act? Final curtain? Final solution? (we are indebted to Katie Hopkins celebrated UK ratbag and our very own Fraser Anning for this term) . Find out in this next blistering episode, and hold fast.
The Brisbane Line in the 40’s was sponsored by White King and CSR, for a ‘Cleaner Whiter Australia”!!!
As we stood there surveying the enormity of the operation before us stretching in all directions as far as the eye could proverbially see, an announcement came over the Tannoy; ‘New projects, I want section twelve through to fifteen in the operations room at five ack emma, all other stations stand by for an important announcement from section leader’.
Then, just as soon as the hubbub of white noise stopped it re-started as an enormous screen lit up the centre of the Operations Bunker. Before us the northern portion of Australia was shown divided between Brisbane and Broome, the announcement both in English and Chinese, proclaimed the “New Nine Dash Line” then under a series of sub-headings fragments of other mineral rich and water resourced portions popped up with headings “ acquired” or “to be acquired”, and an attendant portrait in gold and red of Angus Taylor. Each time the portrait and another fragment appeared under the new title ‘ANOTHER GLORIOUS JAM- LAND HOLDING’ , the thousands of operators all cheered mechanically from their standing position.
The Japanese had their own Brisbane Line which excised the ” Useless bits” to the local indiginies.
The location of the Ord River Scheme was of particular interest. More dashed lines denoted which fragments were to be entirely privatised and jointly divided between Angus’s jam-land, and ‘Twiggy Corp’. It didn’t take a genius to recognise who the owner of Twiggy Corp might be, and you’ll laugh; ‘guess who’s the managing director of the entire operation’? The Big A!
So we asked the question, ‘Hey Benny-Boy’ who is the woman behind the curtain’? We could tell with the light through the curtain and the silhouette, this was not arguably Australia’s biggest and powerful woman but a much smaller woman who loomed large in silhouette, with what looked like a riding crop and a pair of exceptionally high-heeled boots. We knew they were high heeled boots cos we’d been to plenty of Alexander Downer’s tea parties when he was Foreign Minister. With Alex in the mix, as witness K would tell you; ‘we were up against a pretty well connected dude’. But who was she? It was disturbing not knowing, and yet tantalising in spite of the fact that her identity, once revealed would result in our imminent expiration.
‘I dunno, Benny who is it’?
‘I dunno, ask Barnaby’, he scoffed,
‘Howsabout your mate Dutto’?
‘Nup mate, warmer’,
‘Allright then’, l said; ‘a ballsy woman, howsabout Susan Ley’?
‘Nup, nor the sheila that runs the office for women, Nup, not balsy enough. C’mon fellas I thought youse was informed, we’re talking about the ballsisest ball breaker this side of Maggie Thatcher’,
We were imperilled, if we got the answer wrong, Benny would throw us back into the swirling vortex of raw sewerage, to be converted and fed back to Canberra’s whole food community as tofu.
The Nine Dash Line, not to be confused with the Brisbane line, or the GSEACPS, (Greater South east Asian Co- Prosperity Sphere) though with similar aims. Principles currently guiding ‘the intervention’ and ‘clothing the gap’ federal policies.
Benny laughed, ‘
‘Jeez , this is as much fun as throwing a wop bastard off a cliff and the pluggin him just to be sure’,
Ces laughed, ‘that’s what I like about you Benny Boy, you’re always focused on the rewards, after this little mission, your spot on the AWM is guaranteed. I’m sure Brendan’s thinking of a whole gallery just devoted to you’,
Jeez, I wonder what it’s gonna be called’?
Ha ha, it’s gonna be called “ Inside the Fat-Lady’s arms,’ we thought, you’d like this, we’d get Marise Payne to open it up’,
Hahhahhahahah, Ben was convulsed with laughter, bet that’s the only thing that’s ever opened her up ever’!!
Benny- Boy laughed until it hurt,
GINA’S Powerful Inner Circle!
Ces and I stood back shocked at this infantile demonstration of schoolboy Chauvinism. Clearly Benny-Boy was a St Kevins Boy, and contemporaneous to the very core of the low level humour championed by these titular figureheads of Australian mainstream values. Good thing it was dark, cos they couldn’t see us blush. It was in a word, ‘Unbecoming’.
‘Allright then’, Ces had had enough, preferring scatalogical immersion to the tedium of Angus’s puzzle, a trial by ordeal in the very ordeal we all felt as taxpayers financing his mate Nev, and Big COAL.
‘Allright then’, Ces splurted in exasperation Howsabout the ugliest person who ever strode on the floor of parliament’?,
‘It’s yer last chance boys and it aint George Christensen’!!,
Ben grinned evilly.
Allright then i’ll give youse a clue, what’s your reaction when I say her first name is ‘Sophie’?
GREAT WOMEN and OUTSTANDING PRINCIPLES!
You could hear a stiletto drop.
‘Got it in one, Soph is the gal who’s working with us to secure the biggest deal in corporate history! Just the sight of Sophie on the board of the Fair Work Commission has set back Arbitration to the Stone Age. She can do the same for the taxpayer, and not be worried about what you call ‘ethics and personal responsibility’ That’s what we like about Sophie, there’s no heart, just opportunism, That’s why she’s our kinda gal.
‘I’m ready for ya BOYS!’, and with a swirl of the fabric, there emerged Australia’s (arguably) most powerful woman! And sure enough it was Sophie Mirabella!
Will this really be the final curtain? Does the fat lady sing? How much weight has Sophie put on since working with Gina? Find our in our net Graeco- Australian tragedy. ‘A sophists choice for Sophocles’, Or ‘Sophies sward of Damocles’!