WUHAN DAN told us under oath that Maypole dancing during lockdown “IST VERTBOTEN”!

It all began when we took a  wrong turn at Pride Street

WE at pcbycp are very gay and very proud. We’ve been gay ever since the premier ‘WUHAN DAN’ closed down maypole dancing and dwarf throwing, Then he imposed a five thousand dollar fine for singing in public places and Morris dancing. This was the bitter end. That was the same day his government proclaimed its lgbti inclusiveness and gender promotion. He told us; ‘Being gay or even being a woman is no barrier to advancement in his state’.  And yet the first thing he did under a bit of questioning was throw his female Health Minister under the bus. Why he did this we don’t know? He doesn’t know either. He kept saying “I don’t know’. He did this whilst he passed a bill to to increase police powers. He obviously hates Maypole dancing and dwarf throwing. Ces said; ‘he’s intent on closing things down cos he’s basically anti-social.  You can tell by the ears, he’s got wing-nut syndrome’. We looked at the picture, he never smiled or cracked a joke, we had to agree. 

Donald swore under oath that PROUD BOYS can Maypole Dance whenever they effin feel like it!

But it got us thinking we ‘re feeling really isolated now. With the five thousand fine for stepping outside and for practising Morris dancing we could be hit with a twenty thousand fine, perhaps a hundred thousand fine for repeat offending. We needed solidarity, so we reached out and thought its time we identified with the broader isolated community. In a flash Ces had a group who were intent on reaching out on the internet.  It promoted Pride. We know Pride is the hallmark of being gay, but when we read their manifesto it gave us a bit of a jolt. No mention of Maypole dancing and precious little else that inspired us… 

Then we found out what had happened. We’d been diverted to the WRONG PRIDE group. 

We’d inadvertently been directed to the PROUD BOYS SITE, and not the GAY PRIDE BOYS

DON and JOE in furious debate about the size of their Testimonials under OATH!

This fragment from the Washington post made fascinating reading.

The basic tenet of the group, (PROUD BOYS) McInnes wrote at the time, is “Western chauvinists who refuse to apologise for creating the modern world.” He continued: “Like Archie Bunker, they long for the days when ‘girls were girls and men were men.’ This wasn’t controversial even twenty years ago, but being proud of Western culture today is like being a crippled, black, lesbian communist in 1953.”

“Western chauvinist,” he added, “includes all races, religions, and sexual preferences.”

Becoming a full-fledged Proud Boy is a four-step process, according to McInnes’s essay. First, a prospective member publicly declares he’s a Proud Boy. Second, he undergoes a ritual beating that continues until he can name five breakfast cereals. “The rationale here is we all need better ‘adrenaline control,’ ” McInnes wrote. Members must also swear off masturbation at this stage.

Joe gets real on the size of his Testimonials. Don always likes to exaggerate a bit.

At the third level, members get a Proud Boy tattoo bearing the group’s name. The fourth and final step involves getting into a public fight that advances the group’s cause.

There is no official Proud Boys uniform, but members often show up at rallies wearing black and yellow Fred Perry polo shirts, clothing once associated with British white supremacist movements in the 1970s. The fashion label has denounced the group and discontinued the design in North America.

Phew that was a close un, WE could’ve been ;

‘like being a crippled, black, lesbian communist in 1953.”

Psssst, for the very latest in PROUD BOYS Fashion, and updates on which breakfast cereal to remember, you can’t go past Angus and his mates at JAM-LAND. Send self addressed envelope to Angus, Co Cayman Islands Murray Darling fund and you’ll receive a token to participate in Australia’s manufacturing business start up with COAL and GAS. (Renewable based industrial start- ups need not apply.)

President Trump is a huge fan of Michael Jackson.

We’re hoping to interview a crippled, black lesbian communist from 1953 to tell us, but aint found one yet. Could be a by-product of living in the Federal electorate of Kooyong. Not a lot of diversity there, but we’re hopeful. Still we whipped down to the supermarket, and ordered five different breakfast cereals. One can’t be too careful.  Cos we knew, a bit like the Presidential debate, that not being able to name at least five, without pause, hesitation or repetition could be painful….. as Donald said himself, ‘it’s gonna be BAD’!