‘Foghorn psychosis’; Agressive, bombastic and insecure.

Dear reader, though it pains me I’ve got to tell you something you already quite well know. The country we live in is just getting a little bit slow.

Every way I look at it, this country demonstrates all the hallmarks of ‘ABI’, Acquired Brain Injury. Now I know it’s not nice to use words like, “retarded, or disabled’, nor is it proper to refer to anyone, let alone an nation as “not the full stack of bricks’ or, ‘a few twigs short of a load’, not the ‘full bottle’, a ‘little slow on the uptake’ or as Foghorn Leghorn was fond of saying; “bout as sharp as a bowling ball’. But I say this much, unless we understand that our country is slow, and has “special needs,’ we cannot begin to reconstruct and assist in its rehabilitation.

I know you’re familiar with all the tell tale signs, The country is easilly distracted, and can’t focus on one thing for more than a few seconds. I know quite rightfully that a specialist I went to suggested , “foetal alcohol syndrome’, but the native inhabitants assure us that it was never befuddled when they were in charge these last fifty thousand years. So I suppose we’ve got to face up to it, we’re not really very good parents, and we’ve dropped the ball so to speak.

Let’s look at just some of the hallmark symptoms. Rather than invest in new technologies, we put our hand up for the worlds biggest nuclear waste dump. It’s like the village idiot putting on a sandwich board, ‘kick me’. If you’re not a very clever country you worry about your status in the olympic medals tally, and spend billions on elite athletes. You do this whilst nationally you’re top of the league in obesity and preventable diseases, etc. If you’re a really really stupid country you obsess about gay marriage whilst your idealogical rump closes its manufacturing sector down. If you’re a stupid country you’ll go for broke on population increases because only through building more houses and shopping centres can you maintain economic growth. Because, no one in the “not the full stack of bricks’ country is encouraged to be clever. And besides being “clever” is shorthand for being a ‘bit of a dickhead’.

CSIRO Climate Staff on the wrong side of the fence begin a global search for intelligence.

A stupid country slices it education system and finds ways to destroy its excellent public health system. If you’re a monumentally stupid country you pull apart your research wings and forelock tug to big interests, who inwardly despise you whilst the the other one percent simply don’t care. The symptoms are plain to see, it’s ABI on a national scale, and I’m really very scared.

I used to be so fond of this country, but now, it’s not even interested in anything “we”, the public have to say. It’s  sort of disengaged, autistic, ‘out there”. And it used to be such an engaging little country. I know it was always obsessed with sport, but it was outgoing, enthusiastic, and eager to indulge in all manner of experimental and outrageous activity. Now it’s just sitting in front of the telly, watching the test pattern and reality TV.

To see such a decline in a short space of time, It’s depressing. And we thought, that a new Prime Minister would be just the trick. We’ve had almost half a dozen these past few years, but any mother will tell you that it’s worth searching for a specialist who understands and can tap into the unrealised potential that lurks within. But the current one is not proving much better either. Seems to have attention deficit issues as well. And if you ask me , the entire health system, once the very best in the world is sort of kind of being second rated.

Possible sign of intelligence, Shortlisted for CSIRO CEO position. Failed intelligence test.

Is there a cure?

Three Wise men, a possible joint tripartite CSIRO  CEO position was muted, but sadly failed the intelligence test. search for a new CSIRO CEO continues.

Absolute front runner for CSIRO CEO position, but fell short due to emotional instability.

Recently it was suggested by a philosopher , not an economist or a doctor that the problem lay trapped within the ‘collective subconscious’ of the country. I had no idea what he was talking about and asked my friend who’s a paediatrician, and she suggested that it was perhaps due to long term dietary deficiencies. I was flummoxed, so what do we do? ‘Well you need to feed it brain food’. But how do I know what food to give? And she replied, ‘ask it’?. Never thought of that, so I asked the people who were supposed to look after this country the last fifty thousand years and they said; ‘respect it, listen, and the rest will follow’. I asked them do they respect it?, ‘Yes’. And do you listen to it?, ‘Yes’. And have you tried to tell the vast majority about it? ‘Yes’, they replied, ‘but no one is listening’. And why? ‘Well it’s tricky, but they don’t want to listen, because if they listened really hard and started treating the original australians with dignity and negotiated a treaty that provides a dignified and resolute future, it could be transformative, and establish a very clever country indeed. And that’s scary’.

Why so scary? I naively asked. ‘Because asking is risky, when you don’t know what the answer is’.

Intelligent, forthright and hard Hitting. The NEW CEO of CSIRO Climate Science can walk the walk and talk the talk!!

But why answer at all then?.. ‘Ha ha, (they laughed), ‘You’ve gotta start somewhere’.