‘Note the prominent jaw, the noble brow of the thinker. The red staring eye, strained by poring over the historical record in the dim light of the scholastic garret. The facial hair growth, testament to a life of devotion to the world of ideas rather than personal grooming. He, like many another before him, has wrestled with the deep contradictions of the American past, but plainly reconciled them’. Editors Note: There is an unsubstantiated rumour that this could be the new adviser to the former Minister for Education, upon the ‘History in Schools ‘syllabus. The Rt. Hon Christopher Pyne. Debonair hat and leather belt generously lent on this occasion by the Minister for Innovation. (from his personal collection).

Dear reader, another enthralling piece from our near south, (Paris End) correspondent Gran Tourismo Bearegard. Once again, he has untied the Gordian Knot of American Politics and faith and explained all in plain Ye Olde English.  There is truth in the old adage that Southern Culture always leaves skid marks upon the soul. That’s why good soul music is crafted there.  Read on…

30/1/16 ‘We seek wisdom, not equivocation. Some sit at the feet of a guru. Some uncritically accept the word of parents, teachers, preachers or Uncle Bubba. But there are those few whose heroic intellectual struggles are finally rewarded with the clarity of vision that is achieved only by the truly devoted. Such an one is above, the very model of Chaucer’s clerk’: 

But al be that he was a philosophre,


Yet hadde he but litel gold in cofre;


But al that he myghte of his freendes hente,


On bookes and on lernynge he it spente,


And bisily gan for the soules preye


Of hem that yaf hym wherwith to scoleye


Of studie took he moost cure and moost heede


Noght o word spak he moore than was neede


And that was seyd in forme and reverence


And short and quyk, and ful of hy sentence


Sownynge in moral vertu was his speche,


And gladly wolde he lerne, and gladly teche.

(Protestant Bobba Lee noticing that the spire of papist St John The Baptist is an ill-disguised muh-zuh-lim minaret.) Stand Proud!!

Gladly, too, would those of us learn whose minds are not poisoned by the communistic and godless “education” system of these United States. For only an opportunist atheistic commie could have done what Mayor Mitch did in the shadow of Holy Week, and secured the agreement of the stooge councillors of Orleans to erase the collective memory of the populace. These ideologues have decided to rewrite the Dixie story by removing from public display the memorials to our illustrious forebears Bobba-Lee, Pee-Bo and Jeb Davis together with the obelisk in Lib-er-tay Place. Not so much re-write it as expunge it altogether. So, we are to witness Lee Circle’s transformation into what? It is a matter of historical fact that before the erection of the ever-enemy-facing Virginian’s statue in 1877, the then Tivoli Circle was given over to danger.

The Picayune of September 20 1876 reported the grievous injury suffered by a lady struck in the head as she passed a dozen men – read “thugs” – playing at base ball in the square. For more than a century and a quarter, ladies have been spared the threat of “heavy balls flying promiscuously around” the intersection of St Charles and Howard Avenues. “Incessant swearing and vulgarity” has been eliminated from the vicinity. Uncle Bobba has spent that time standing sternly upon his column, staring fixedly in the general direction of Nova Scotia as we sing “all day and all night, angels watching over me.”

When MORE is NEVER ENOUGH, stand by for G.T’s gripping conclusion in tomorrow’s unspeakable next installment. You can tighten the cord of your pyjamas, now. Or for those up super early in Lycra fitting comfort, rest easy!